Addyson’s upcoming surgery will be # 15.
15 times we have handed her over to a surgeon for a surgery/surgical procedure.
15 times we kissed her goodbye, then turned and walked away, acting like all was good….. like we had no worries, so she wouldn’t worry, but deep down, every time you get this gut wrenching feeling. You get this weight on your shoulders just waiting to hear an update from the surgeon. We sit and try to talk about anything we can think of to keep our minds busy, but in all reality you are just staring at the clock counting down the amount of time she’s been in the O.R.
The O.R. board is a double edged sword. I love it because I can track her progress, yet my eyes are drawn to it and they don’t want to look anywhere else. We discuss leaving the O.R. waiting room to get some fresh air, but then you always worry you will miss the surgeon if he comes out looking for you. We have over time gotten more comfortable with stepping outside for a few minutes, but the anxiety is real. The need to be close to the O.R. is real. My mind says Stay Close. Be nearby. Don’t go too far.
All these times, we have also had to say goodbye to Ethen for multiple days in a row so we could tend to Addyson post surgery/procedure. He has had to sleep over at a grandparents house so we can rush to the Emergency room. We as parents know that he’s okay, but it’s still hard. It’s tough to leave him, not knowing how many days it will be until we see him again.
We have 15 days until she gets admitted for surgery. The packing has begun. We honestly have no idea how long she will be inpatient, she never follows the timeline so there is a lot to pack. Covid has made it more difficult, however we fully understand the restrictions.
Addyson has a brain MRI coming up on the 27th, but besides that…. No major upcoming appointments before surgery. We did get an order for a sleep study, so we need to get that scheduled.
Please know that we love and appreciate each of you who follow Addyson’s journey.